Author Topic: The Perfect Mother-in-Law  (Read 668 times)

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kathleen

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The Perfect Mother-in-Law
« on: April 30, 2010, 12:30:45 PM »
You all have gotten me so interested in this subject of MIL's that I've been checking elsewhere on the Internet.  Today I found this from the Oprah web site, following the question, what is the perfect mother-in-law?

Do you see how negatively this starts out?  As if having a mother-in-law as a PERSON (not a LABEL) is almost unheard of, particularly a good person?

The point here that we as mother-in-laws raised the sons these DILs love is so well-taken.  The sons/husbands are great and the MIL's are awful?
Hmmmm.  Somebody is missing the connection!  Or maybe when the son turns out well it's 100% the result of the father?

Anyway, it's nice to see just one DIL report that her MIL is a good person.  Maybe there's hope yet for the future.  I copied and pasted the message below exactly.  And now that I think of it, who is the perfect daughter-in-law? 

Kathleen


"I know that your'e not gonna believe this, but my Mother In Law is truly my best friend. I know it sounds nuts but it is true. She is the kindest, most thoughtful, caring, talented, and unselfish person that I have ever met. Ever since we met, things just clicked. I have always been able to tell her anything and everything. Because of what a wonderful person she is, I have been given a totally sweetheart of a husband. I have been truly blessed. We have lived next door to my in laws for 16 years, & they are moving next week. It will be so weird with them gone...She taught me how to love my Mom unconditionally. That is something that I will always admire about her. Her ablility to think about others first. I will miss her so much. So when I hear about all of the "Monster In Law" stories, I feel so very lucky that I was given an Angel instead of one of those."  Oprah.com Message Board   :)

Offline Pen

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Re: The Perfect Mother-in-Law
« Reply #1 on: April 30, 2010, 08:50:39 PM »
That was refreshing. I do get tired of the MIL-bashing, the jokes, the stereotypes & the labels. IMHO, part of it is predjudice against women, especially aging women. We don't respect "the white hairs" anymore. That's a term of endearment in some cultures!
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Hope

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Re: The Perfect Mother-in-Law
« Reply #2 on: April 30, 2010, 10:47:32 PM »
Thanks, Kathleen.  You bring interesting things to the fore front here.  I found WWU while looking for topics on the internet on how to be a great mother-in-law.  If anyone finds anything else on how to be a great mil or if our dil's could help us out, I would very much appreciate it.   

I know there are both hard-to-get-along-with mils and dils - it's not the title, but the personality.  If you are a difficult dil, imho you are likely to be a difficult mil.  One thing I have thought about is that mils in most cases have been dils and can see it from both sides - plus they have years of experience.  I think patience also comes with aging.  Aren't we wonderful?   ;)  Well, at least the mil's on this site?
Love and hugs, Hope