Author Topic: Big News!  (Read 2502 times)

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Offline tryingmybest

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Big News!
« on: January 03, 2012, 05:30:43 AM »
gonna be a grandmother! still finding being a MIL a big challenge so this scares me a bit, any advice right out of the gate. my DIL is due this spring. what do you wish you'd done, or not done?

Offline Pooh

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #1 on: January 03, 2012, 06:53:06 AM »
Congrats!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline Pen

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #2 on: January 03, 2012, 07:28:56 AM »
TMB, congratulations. Haven't had the opportunity to make GP mistakes yet, so can't help you there, lol. You'll be fine; the wise GMs here will steer you right.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #3 on: January 03, 2012, 11:35:07 AM »
Congrats! Put her in the lead and follow. Sending love...
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline pam1

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #4 on: January 03, 2012, 04:19:58 PM »
Congratulations :)
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

Distressedmom

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #5 on: January 04, 2012, 04:35:34 AM »
Congrats!!  As a GM with 9 GKs all I can say is love them.  Accept you DIL as much as possible, don't offer advice unless asked for and make her feel a part of your family.  We don't have to love our DIL/SIL but for the sake of our GC we do need to get along with them. If they are truly wrong or bad people it will show soon enough and if not you might just find you can love them too.  I really disliked my SIL at first but he is now more of a DS to me than my own DSs

Offline Begonia

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #6 on: January 04, 2012, 06:09:04 AM »
Congratulations!!
Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is a mystery, Today is a gift (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Offline FAFE

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #7 on: January 04, 2012, 02:04:40 PM »
Yah!  Another sweet bebe on the way!  I'm with the others, don't give advice unless you're asked.  I always add, but you might want to see what the doctor says.  Most counts, I've been dead on with what I said. 

Offline Doe

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #8 on: January 04, 2012, 02:39:03 PM »
Congrats! Put her in the lead and follow. Sending love...

I read this as "put the baby on a leash and follow" but as I re-read this, I'm thinking that might not have been the message?

Put the DIL in the lead, right?    :D :D

phillek

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #9 on: January 04, 2012, 03:09:11 PM »
Congratulations!!  I'm a DIL and I can tell you that if your relationship with DIL and/or DS is already on shaky ground it can get much, much worse if you don't follow the above advice to refrain from giving unsolicited advice.  Sorry, but this includes body language and between-the-lines hinting advice as well.

As long as baby is safe, then whatever mom and dad decide is just the perfect thing.  If you can restrain yourself, you might find yourself answering a lot of questions once they get comfortable :)

Also, if you don't want to do something they ask, just say no.  But if they don't ask you to do something you want to do, don't guilt them or try to make them ask you.  I think that covers it.

I know you probably have been on this side and already know this stuff.  You'll be great!!  Congrats again!

Offline herbalescapes

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #10 on: January 09, 2012, 08:28:47 AM »
Congratulations!  If only we could provide a list of dos and don'ts that would guarantee a happy expanded family...

Say a prayer, keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best.  You've read enough other stories to know a lot of dos and don'ts, and you also know that what works for one family doesn't work for another.  Or what works for one family member won't work for another.  Feel better?  I sound like the voice of doom, don't I?  Really, I mean to sound like the voice of optimism.  Put the past behind you (even if they can't) and assume the best.  Sometimes we are self-fulfilling prophecies, so make sure that prophecy is a good one. 

Good luck and keep us updated. 

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #11 on: January 09, 2012, 10:14:57 AM »
congratulations !

Buy some duct tape !!

 :) :)

sesamejane

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #12 on: January 15, 2012, 08:25:50 PM »
Advice?  Enjoy enjoy enjoy !!!


I guess I would add to "stand by your self."  Be your own best mother, friend.  Learn to say 'no' if you feel disrespect developing.  Do not feed emotional blackmail if used against you with respect visiting the gc.

I am happy for you...

Offline tryingmybest

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Re: Big News!
« Reply #13 on: January 17, 2012, 05:16:59 PM »
Thank you Wise Women! Getting excited. ;D