Author Topic: Sad news.  (Read 2927 times)

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Offline Glenda

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Sad news.
« on: December 06, 2011, 05:55:28 AM »
Have had a very hard week.  My Dad passed away last tuesday.  He has been sick this last year,and we had recently put him in a home.  He suffered a major stroke on Sunday, & was gone early Tuesday morning.  Now that the wakes & funeral are over, & we are not busy, it has really set in that I will not hear his voice again, he will not ring my doorbell when he is out for a drive & decides to pop in.  Watching my Dad go was the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my entire life.  We, (my Mom, siblings, & I), were all with him. 
For the last year my Dad had told my Mom & I, "I'm not going to be here for Chritmas, you know".  Somehow he knew he was going.  The last two weeks leading up to this stroke, he had been sick, throwing up, feverish, he was cranky & stubborn, & oh so lovable.  I visited him in the morning, the day he had his stroke, & he gave me this big, long, silent, look.  Now thinking about that look, I know he was trying to tell me he was leaving.  I wish I could bring him back, I wish I could stop these tears that forever fall from my eyes. I wish, when I say I love you Dad, I could hear him say, just one more time, "I love you more!!".

Offline Pooh

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #1 on: December 06, 2011, 06:21:45 AM »
I'm so sorry Glenda.  I'm sending healing and comforting thoughts your way.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline Glenda

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #2 on: December 06, 2011, 06:31:37 AM »
Thank-you so much Pooh.  :)

RedRose

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #3 on: December 06, 2011, 06:40:23 AM »
I am so sorry Glenda. He STILL hears you and loves you even more.

Offline Glenda

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #4 on: December 06, 2011, 07:09:52 AM »
Thank-you RedRose, you brought a smile to my face.  Knowing my Dad he does still hear me!  :)

Offline pam1

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #5 on: December 06, 2011, 07:28:08 AM »
I'm so sorry, Glenda.  You're in my thoughts
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

Offline Doe

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #6 on: December 06, 2011, 07:34:06 AM »
Oh ((((Glenda)))), nothing prepares you for that first parent's death.  I'll be thinking about you today.  Mama and my MIL both died in December and it can really wreak havoc with your emotions.  I'm glad for you that you were able to be with him and help ease him out.

Offline Scoop

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #7 on: December 06, 2011, 07:40:08 AM »
My thoughts are with you.  My Dad died a few years ago and it gets easier, but you will never stop missing him.

Tell us about him, what was he like?  How are you like him?

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #8 on: December 06, 2011, 10:51:49 AM »
aww Glenda

bless your dear heart ,
I still miss my dear father and he passed many years ago .
I know he's thinking of me when he sends me certain songs in my head , he was a great singer , then I know he's watching
over me . Also watch for a stray feather , then you know he's paid a visit .
Some people think that strange , but it's such a comfort when you are missing someone, and you'll always
be his little girl .........sending hugs ...x

Offline Scoop

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #9 on: December 06, 2011, 10:55:58 AM »
LL - for us it's "Pennies from Heaven"!  My Dad used to do metal detecting as a hobby, so whenever we find a penny on the ground, we know it's from him.  One time we found several dollars worth of change on the ground and we figured he wanted to treat us to a coffee!

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #10 on: December 06, 2011, 11:03:54 AM »
We have no place to put such loss. There's no "User's Manual" to walk you though what has just happened. When I lost my mom, I had to "do something" and the fact that there was nothing I could do left me feeling lost. So, I started writing to her…several times a day at first. I poured out my anguish and my anger…my fear of the empty landscape she left in my world…my sense that I should have, could have done better. Whatever surfaced, I wrote. Little by little without realizing it, I shifted to writing about memories and eventually found myself even smiling at times…even if through tears. I don't know when I started doing it…and it may sound nuts…but the day came when I began writing answers back to me from her. No, there were no voices…I knew I was initiating it…but/and I also knew what she would say to me. I still write at times and so does she...and she died in 1954. Sending love...
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #11 on: December 06, 2011, 11:08:09 AM »
Dear Scoop :

Isn't it a comfort ? I truly believe we will see them again .

I will share with you one of my strange stories . While in a hospital waiting room while undergoing tests
you can imagine I was quite nervous .
I was sitting about 6 feet away from a window which  was open horizontally , a feather flew in horizontal
and landed in my lap , my worries flew out of the window .
Weird , buy hey if it works for me , that's fine .

Offline luise.volta

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #12 on: December 06, 2011, 11:45:19 AM »
LL - Beautiful!
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Doe

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #13 on: December 06, 2011, 11:47:15 AM »
When MIL died, she called out to us in the middle of the night after not speaking for weeks.  We went into her room and had the honor of being with her when she passed.  It was midnight, all dark with only one small light in the room.  At one point, DH and I both noticed the room brighten up and we both were infused with a sense of gratitude from MIL, thanking us for taking care of her when she wasn't able to.  We both got the distinct feeling that she (the being) was fine and off to where ever she was going.  This was after years of the real MIL not being there fully, just the remaining body that was finishing its time on earth.   
It was an experience I'll never forget and it made me feel a lot better about the process.

Offline Pooh

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Re: Sad news.
« Reply #14 on: December 06, 2011, 11:52:01 AM »
I love all of these reminders.  For me, it's butterflies.  When my Grandma passed in 1984, a dear lady at her Church sent me an arrangement of flowers that had a silk butterfly in it.  The card said, "Your Grandma was like a beautiful butterfly that spends a limited time on earth but touches everyone and everything in it's passing."  I think of her every time I see a butterfly and when my Grandpa passed in 2003, I looked over and spotted a butterfly flitting around his flowers and I knew it was her telling me it was ok.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell