Author Topic: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU  (Read 1929 times)

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Offline luise.volta

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The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« on: June 08, 2011, 09:16:30 PM »
The following is not meant to create a discussion. It is merely a statement from me to those I hold near and dear.

I am sure the last couple of weeks have been confusing for some of you. There has been both speculation and accusation flying around about members leaving. I am well aware that things are being said about me, how I run the forum and my integrity. I built this website with the sole intention of reaching out and helping others. I did not create it as a place for people to malign, harass or intimidate others. That was never nor will it ever be what this forum is about. There are other forums that cater to that type of behavior.
 
I want to assure all of you that I have no intention of entering a debate contest with prior members, current members or people creating accounts to try to intimidate. I also have no intention of entering a "he said/she said" contest. Over the last two weeks, the Moderators, Kirk and I have been kept busy removing controversial postings and deleting members that have asked to be deleted, (as well as those seen as detrimental to our commitment to you.) We will continue to represent you in that manner.
 
I want to apologize for the confusion and distraction this has created for some of you. At the same time I assure you that we will continue to remove all negative posts and threads as well as any member that seems to be here for the sole purpose of creating drama. I am not perfect, all I can offer is my best and hold myself to a standard I have set for myself and the forum. I can not hold others to that standard but I can see that they have no voice here.

Sending love...
 
« Last Edit: June 19, 2011, 07:32:22 AM by luise.volta »
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Nana

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2011, 10:16:15 PM »
Love you Luise.
Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove:
Shakespeare

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #2 on: June 09, 2011, 01:31:31 AM »
We support  you Luise ,this is a haven for ladies in need , not more stress .Thank you . :)

Offline Pooh

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #3 on: June 09, 2011, 06:07:04 AM »
Ladies, I know Luise appreciates your support.  I appreciate it as well and am thankful that you have given me the opportunity to help Luise and are understanding when I mess up or do something wrong.  I too am doing the best I can and I am sure I will mess up some (you haven't seen me try to split a topic yet!)  I love this place, the vision behind it and I love you guys!  You are my online sisters!  Muah!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline Pen

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #4 on: June 09, 2011, 08:08:25 AM »
Not to sound overly-dramatic, but I was in anguish when I found this site. I wasn't looking for a place to justify my anger (tempting as that was) and lash out at any one or any group, I was looking for healing. Having to calm down and think through my raw feelings before posting was, and still is, a great exercise that taught me a lot about my role in my suffering and what my priorities are. Had I been encouraged to rant violently over and over and over I would not have made progress and probably would have ruined any chances of maintaining a relationship w/DS or building one w/DIL.

Support and compassion do not necessarily mean blind approval of someone's behavior. This site provides a shoulder but also a prod if we're locked into our righteousness and can't see how our ineffective behavior contributes to our issues.

For all of this I am grateful and am honored to be able to help.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline Barbie

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #5 on: June 09, 2011, 08:53:31 AM »
I've been away for a few weeks and I'm still very confused about what's happened.

Louise, I for one want to thank you and Kirk for all you've done and continue to do in order to help so many in need. Words cannot describe how much this forum has helped me. I still wish I could change things and go back to having the relationship with DS that we once had but I am very at peace with myself and enjoying all that life has to offer thanks to this forum and it's nice to know whenever I'm in need of support or just vent, I can always come back.

I also want to thank the new moderators, you're doing a fine job.

Love to all.

Offline Pen

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #6 on: June 09, 2011, 09:17:26 AM »
Barbie, it's good to hear that you've found peace and enjoyment in life despite the changes you've had to endure in your relationship with your DS. Thanks for the "thanks" to the mods, too. You are very welcome :)
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
-- Annie Gottlieb

Offline pam1

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #7 on: June 09, 2011, 09:42:13 AM »
Barbie, I was wondering how you were doing.  It's nice to hear that you've found peace even without the outcome you wanted.  Don't give up hope.

Like Pen, I too came here in a really rough spot.  I am forever thankful for all the women who took the time to disagree and respond to me.  They gave me the opportunity to examine myself and look at my situation from another perspective.  My situation will probably never have the outcome I was hoping but now, I'm ok with that.

I hope to give other women who come here the same benefits I got.  It doesn't mean it's the chance for everyone to agree, what's the chances of real change happening then?  Rather it's the chance to participate in real discussions.

For me, I'm aware that in taking the good from here also means accepting the bad.  Which is that we are all real behind our postings, we are humans and we are going to make mistakes.  Just b/c there is a mod behind our name doesn't mean we are exempt from that wonderful human quality lol.  Personally, you know where to find me if you want to give me feedback....my door is open.

People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

Sassy

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #8 on: June 09, 2011, 10:57:45 AM »
  :-* Muah to all!   And barbie how nice to read your good news!

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #9 on: June 09, 2011, 11:16:16 AM »
I have seen boards torn apart over silly things before. People forget that this is just a bunch of strangers from all over the world who write anonymously about a common problem. It is easy to walk away from or to simply ignore.

Louis, I am sorry this is happening now, but I am sure the board will bounce back under your tender guidance. You are doing good here.

Offline Barbie

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #10 on: June 09, 2011, 12:18:21 PM »
Thanks everyone. Just to let you know I have been pretty much where I am for some time now, once in a while I need reassurance or just to vent, even though I have accepted my situation I sometimes still wonder why we let it get out of hand, I was very devoted to my parents, I didn’t depend on them at all, but always made sure they knew they were special. My other children although are very busy with their lives,  still make DH and I feel loved while the one who was the closest, to me at least, is so distant and makes us think he doesn’t care, go figure…

Offline elsieshaye

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2011, 02:08:58 PM »
I just assumed Mercury was in retrograde again, or there was a full moon, and skipped right over all the crazy. :)  People can be just plain weird sometimes, and it almost never makes sense to get involved in the weirdness.  Like you say often, it's usually best to take what we need and leave the rest.  Everything else is none of our business.

Hang in there, Luise and Kirk, and thanks for all that you do.  Particularly considering that this is not an actual paid job for either of you, and represents a huge commitment of time and emotional/physical energy.
This too shall pass.  All is well.

gretchenw

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #12 on: June 19, 2011, 03:13:30 AM »
I believe this website provides a valuable service.  I have read a lot of postings here and see the support the members give one another.  You have a wonderful sisterhood here.

It is with that frame of mind that I tell you these things:
1. A huge fraction of your members are not "members" in the usual sense of the word.  It is not normal that ~1400 of your members have their own web sites.  Therefore it seems likely that these registrations have been for the purpose of advertising a web page, or for the purpose of driving up the ratings of someone's web site by increasing the number of links to it.  (I did click on two of these links - with my force field shield up - but I don't recommend that anyone other than your web maintenance person click on these links.)
2.  You have been hit with a lot of spam registrations in the past 10 days.  On about 10 June, your registration rate increased by nearly a factor of 10.  If these were true members, the page views would have also increased.  However, if you check your statistics, you will see that the huge increase in registrations is not accompanied by a concomitant increase in page views.  Therefore it seems likely that most of the new "members" since 10 June are not real members, merely spam of some kind.

I recommend that your web person take a look at these things.

Offline luise.volta

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #13 on: June 19, 2011, 07:17:39 AM »
Thanks. I have copied and pasted that to Kirk. My son is my webmaster. Sending love...
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's a quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I'll try again tomorrow." -- Mary Ann Radmacher

Offline Rose799

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Re: The Health and Wellbeing of WWU
« Reply #14 on: June 19, 2011, 08:00:51 AM »
I believe this website provides a valuable service. 

Amen!