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What do you think of grandma baby showers?

Started by pam1, May 23, 2011, 02:13:54 PM

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pam1

I've made it a point to not buy off of anyone's registry, I dislike the practice.  It seems like it takes away the meaning of the gift to me. 

I will take a hostess gift to a housewarming party though, like a bottle of wine or plant.  I did get my sister a spiritual cleanser for her first home, that was a fun party! 

People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

SassyDI

Quote from: overwhelmed123 on May 23, 2011, 06:26:26 PM
I didn't even know you were supposed to bring a gift to a housewarming party..I thought it was just to show off a new house?  Geez, I guess I need to get with the times..

LOL I always buy a candle or a vase. I think we were deemed rude when  FIL and his wife a gift for their "wedding."  I say wedding like that because they were already married.  They got married in secert the only reason FIL finally told his son's was a friend of the family found out though their builder(they were building a condo and the builder knew the friend and didn't know their marriage was a secert).  GMIL was so mad that they didn't get married in a church and she said they were not married more like sister and brother.(I never go that one)  So they got married in a church and had a party at their house after.  I was pregnant and sick so DH went to the wedding part alone then called and begged me to come to the after party.  i really didn't want to go because I thought it was dumb.  They were married it was their dumb idea to get married in secert. 

SassyDI

Quote from: pam1 on May 23, 2011, 06:31:15 PM
I've made it a point to not buy off of anyone's registry, I dislike the practice.  It seems like it takes away the meaning of the gift to me. 

I will take a hostess gift to a housewarming party though, like a bottle of wine or plant.  I did get my sister a spiritual cleanser for her first home, that was a fun party!

See I think it makes things less confusing if I buy her a bouncy and this person buys a bouncy and another it means more work for the mother to be.  Or even the bride to be.  But I am a homemade gifter.  So I like to make something and buy on thing off the regerstery.

holliberri

Quote from: pam1 on May 23, 2011, 06:31:15 PM
I will take a hostess gift to a housewarming party though, like a bottle of wine or plant. 

This is all I do too. Mainly b/c if I ever threw a housewarming party I would like everyone to bring me nice wine. That, and I love orchids.

overwhelmed123

We have some friends that got married at a destination wedding with only family invited.  The bride was a Russian immigrant (legal of course).  After their wedding, they came home and had a party boat with a bunch of people- food, and drinks.  In the evite, they flat out said "we are not registered anywhere because we really don't need anything, but would love a donation to help with [bride's] immigration attorney's legal fees."  My jaw dropped when I read it.  I almost didn't go, and even when I went, I didn't give much b/c I thought it was so tacky.

pam1

SassyDI, I'm just a grinch  ;D  really.  I can see the need for some people to have registries.  I personally don't want stuff and asking me to make a list is like asking my dog to tell you the time.

I never want to buy people the ordinary stuff, I look and look and look for things they wouldn't buy themselves or a very new gadget or a spiritual cleanser or a singing telegram etc.  It's rare that anyone gets the same thing I finally pick out for the giftee lol.
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

pam1

Quote from: overwhelmed123 on May 23, 2011, 06:40:29 PM
We have some friends that got married at a destination wedding with only family invited.  The bride was a Russian immigrant (legal of course).  After their wedding, they came home and had a party boat with a bunch of people- food, and drinks.  In the evite, they flat out said "we are not registered anywhere because we really don't need anything, but would love a donation to help with [bride's] immigration attorney's legal fees."  My jaw dropped when I read it.  I almost didn't go, and even when I went, I didn't give much b/c I thought it was so tacky.

Now that is funny.

I almost appreciate the outright rude behavior a lot more though.  At least there is entertainment value.  You know that party had to be interesting.
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

holliberri

I had DD's cordblood banked. That was $1200...I paid it, lol, but they sent me a registry link to mail out with baby shower invites. They said, "If you prefer, make a donation of your choice to preserving our baby's cord blood. The best gift you can give is security."

I didn't send those out. I still have them, lol...b/c they make me laugh.

SassyDI

DH told me when his mother passed away people were asking where to donate money.  FIL told DH they should give him the money to help pay for his wife funeral cost.  DH told him not to that was rude I don't think he did.  What brought it up was DH's uncle just passed away and I asked his aunt where to send a donation and he then told me that story.

overwhelmed123

Yes, that it was.
We have another friend (okay technically both of these people were DH's friends first, haha) that got married spur of the moment after dating for about a month.  Just went to the courthouse.  That's cool, nothing wrong with that.  But they're planning a "party" for September to "celebrate" and I'm just DYING to know if they will include a registry.  Even better, are we supposed to bring a gift if we go?  I mean I found out through fbook- this friend hasn't even called to let my DH know he's married.  Not to mention he didn't RSVP to ours, and didn't show up.  Are we supposed to get them a gift for their 5 month anniversary or whatever they will call it? LOL

pam1

Oh my....my flabber is gasted.  They really do have registries for everything now...

People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

overwhelmed123


pam1

Now that is a trend that has to go.  I've been seeing that a lot too, I think facebook and all the social networking is making these type of weddings popular.  Put out the least amount of work you can to get a mountain of presents.  Isn't that precious?
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

SassyDI

Quote from: overwhelmed123 on May 23, 2011, 06:51:10 PM
Yes, that it was.
We have another friend (okay technically both of these people were DH's friends first, haha) that got married spur of the moment after dating for about a month.  Just went to the courthouse.  That's cool, nothing wrong with that.  But they're planning a "party" for September to "celebrate" and I'm just DYING to know if they will include a registry.  Even better, are we supposed to bring a gift if we go?  I mean I found out through fbook- this friend hasn't even called to let my DH know he's married.  Not to mention he didn't RSVP to ours, and didn't show up.  Are we supposed to get them a gift for their 5 month anniversary or whatever they will call it? LOL

I wouldn't I felt no guilt not giving a present for their "Wedding."  She also got mad when I mad a scrapbook of all the boys weddings and didn't put her's in it.(this was before the "wedding")  I only used photos from my camera for his two brothers weddings and then used my pictures that my photographer used.  I did take any pictures at their wedding because well it was a secert. The kicker of it all they were living still with us in the house and came home the day of their wedding and didn't say a word.  Not one word.  DH was on bed rest at the time and when he told him he was over because I had a Christmas party for work. 

AnonymousDIL

Wow, since it seems to be a huge "no, no" on here, I am sooo glad that DH and I didn't go with our one plan. We did not want to live together before we were married. When we bought the house (about 2 months before the wedding). I was to move in because we couldn't afford my apartment and the house (DH still lived at home). Well, MIL (who was very opposed to us "living together" before marraige) kicked DH out. So he ended up on the couch and the guest room for a while. We were going to have the pastor marry us then to avoid the negative "you lived together before you were married" comments (It just isn't proper in my religion). So would that have meant my wedding wasn't real?

I think it happens a lot now. Especially with young couples who can't afford the wedding right away, but can after a year. I don't see anything wrong with it and would still treat it like a normal wedding.

When my DF was killed suddenly, our church had a love offering for US to help pay the cremation costs. Over 400 people showed up at his memorial service and they raised close to $10,000. It was very helpful for us. When a tragedy hits like that, you can use all the help you can get (we were very poor btw.) It's nice to donate money to "Save the Whales" or a "Scholarship Fund," but sometimes what the family really needs is the "Save the House" fund.

Anywho, that's just MHO. A little background so you can see where I am coming from.