Author Topic: What do you think of grandma baby showers?  (Read 21723 times)

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SassyDI

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #105 on: May 24, 2011, 02:02:55 PM »
I don't know OW...does "Goody's Hair Products" have a website????  You know I know what you mean.  I really haven't had many people send me registry info.  A couple of weddings, a couple of showers and a niece that registered stuff on amazon because we kept asking what we could buy for the little one (she lives a couple of states away from everyone).  I just looked at the kinds of stuff they picked, and then went with what my budget could afford.

ADIL, I'm growing it out...it's shoulder length!  ;)

I heart regesteries for wedding and baby showers.  Because then I know I am not getting something they may already had.  And if I am buying dishes I want to buy something the like.  Or the right bouncy.

willingtohelp

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #106 on: May 29, 2011, 07:01:53 PM »
Wow, so many things to talk about...

To start with the original topic, I think grandma showers are odd.  First off, a Baby Shower is named that because you're showering the new mom with things for the Baby, so what is a grandma shower?  Shouldn't you be showering someone with things for the grandma?

Second, very traditional etiquette disapproves of a shower for any children after the first, so the idea that the mom can't have a second shower when she's going to be raising the kid 24/7, but grandma should get one to stock up just seems like it doesn't mesh with etiquette in some way.

Third, I have to wonder how this works.  Does the new mom come?  Is she not invited even though she's the one carrying the child?  I really have never understood this. 

As far as wedding gifts and getting married twice and whatever, I give gifts to people because I am happy for them and want to give them something.  I've given wedding gifts to plenty of people who didn't invite me to the wedding because they got married and I wanted to congratulate them.  And I've had a couple of friends who've had a civil marriage and then had a blessing of the marriage (the religious aspects) after the civil marriage.  One was having an overseas wedding (which became a blessing) and it was easier to take care of all the paperwork on US soil.  Another friend had to be married to her DH to move with him in the Army when he got orders but their wedding was planned for a few months after he shipped out.  So instead of paying a fortune to rebook, they got married at the courthouse and had a blessing on the original date.  Their invitations were worded to reflect this and said that Mr. and Mrs Bride's Parents request the pleasure of your company at the blessing of the marriage of their daughter's name and Mr. their son in law's name on blah blah date and time at x church.  A separate card noted the reception to follow.  But I have never (thank goodness) received an invitation with a registry included.  I agree it's bad manners to include it in the invitation. 

Offline FAFE

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #107 on: June 02, 2011, 05:45:58 AM »
My book club had a "book shower" for me when my daughter adopted baby girl.  Everyone picked out a book that their children loved when they were little.  The books went home with the baby.  I took pictures of BG with each book and gave them to the book club member who had given it to her.

OS and DIL had a civil ceremony in NYC (immigration stuff) and then had a small church wedding for family and friends. 

Offline lancaster lady

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #108 on: June 02, 2011, 09:16:18 AM »
fafe :

That's a lovely idea ...my GD loves books . :)

Offline Pooh

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #109 on: June 02, 2011, 09:17:55 AM »
I think that's great too, what a novel idea.  I do think the difference is it was for the baby but appropriate because you were in the book club.  Nice.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

Offline pam1

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #110 on: June 03, 2011, 09:05:26 AM »
Now that is a good idea in my books. 
People throw rocks at things that shine - Taylor Swift

Offline Pooh

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #111 on: June 03, 2011, 09:42:43 AM »
Oh Lol!
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. -
Joseph Campbell

SassyDI

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #112 on: June 03, 2011, 12:23:09 PM »
My book club had a "book shower" for me when my daughter adopted baby girl.  Everyone picked out a book that their children loved when they were little.  The books went home with the baby.  I took pictures of BG with each book and gave them to the book club member who had given it to her.

OS and DIL had a civil ceremony in NYC (immigration stuff) and then had a small church wedding for family and friends.

I see this different first you did not ask for it or plan it.  2nd it was a book club giving books sound pretty cool idea to me.  A shower where Grandma is getting things like a crib or bouncey chair just seems odd to me.

Offline herbalescapes

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #113 on: July 23, 2011, 07:25:48 AM »
I think Grandma Baby Showers are a trendy thing that has arisen because too many people have too much time and money on their hands (ironic, given the economy as it is, but these started before the economy tanked).  They can be harmless fun or a definite plot for grandma to take attention away from the mom (whether the daughter or DIL). 

I think all showers have gotten out of hand.  I mean, if a couple has been living together for several years and they have all the towels, dishes, etc. they need, why have a bridal shower?  It used to be that a woman got a baby shower for her first child only.  Now people have one for every baby.  This can be a financial drain on one's friends and family.  I think a sense of entitlement has seeped into our culture and is driving all these showers.  There is no shame in declining an invitation and not sending a gift.  Do what you feel comfortable with. 

RedRose

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #114 on: July 23, 2011, 07:46:27 AM »
I am a grandma that does a lot of babysitting...I could of used a shower...I need everything from diapers to crib and car seat...just like a new mom. I don't think attention would or should be taken
away from mom. It would be making things easier for mom because she would not have to drag those things back and forth everyday.

I like the idea.

Offline Pen

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #115 on: July 23, 2011, 07:34:57 PM »
We borrowed or bought used stuff when necessary, but I suspect most new moms now would rather their babies had all new items. For that reason alone, wouldn't it make sense to have a way for a care-giving GP to get some of that stuff w/o having to spend a ton of money?

I would have been so thrilled and grateful to have GPs who were involved in my children's lives it would not have mattered to me at all if someone gave them a shower. The more love for my kids the better, I felt. Too bad for them, and me, we were not so blessed.
Respect ... is appreciation of the separateness of the other person, of the ways in which he or she is unique.
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Belle

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #116 on: August 01, 2011, 02:45:14 PM »
I agree that Grandparents may need some of the standard stuff (crib/pack-n-play, sheets, bath stuff, etc.) so it makes sense to pick up those necessities so mom doesn't have to drag them from place-to-place. 

But I always thought that Grandma was supposed to, you know, buy/borrow them from friends, pick stuff up at yard sales/consignment shops, Freecycle, etc.  Maybe I come from a weird place, but that's just what I've personally known all the Grandmas I know to do.  The Grandma generation I know is "resourceful," and they just know how/where to get things without spending an arm-load...I'm always asking my mom and grandmother where to get stuff cheap! 

And didn't Grandma already have her "showers" when she got married/had children?   

An actual "shower" implies that friends were throwing it for her, which indicates they 1) thought it was a grand idea, OR 2) they think she's nuts but went along with Grandma's wishes to avoid hurt feelings.  An actual "shower" with invites, a registry, cake/punch/mints...just seems "a little much," IMHO.     

Offline FAFE

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Re: What do you think of grandma baby showers?
« Reply #117 on: August 02, 2011, 07:57:56 AM »
After my granddaughter was adopted I bought a new car seat for my car.  Other things such as high chair, walker, play 'n go (play pen) was given to me.  I am ready for any emergency!  Or any chance to keep her. 

I think I stated earlier that my book club had a "book" shower for me.  But, it was at our regular book club, etc.  So, it was not a big affair.  When I wrote my thank you notes, I included a picture of baby with each book.  I think I will go back now and make copies of her with each book and paste them in the book.