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Grab Bag / Re: He's here!
« Last post by allthatmatters on Today at 11:47:22 AM »
Congrats!!  :D
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Grab Bag / Re: He's here!
« Last post by luise.volta on Today at 11:21:07 AM »
:D CONGRATULATIONS!  :D
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Grab Bag / He's here!
« Last post by Pooh on Today at 11:14:30 AM »
Baby arrived this morning at a whopping 4lb 13ozs!  Healthy and Mom is doing fine.

:)
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I think sometimes bossiness is the only way some women can relate across the generational line.  Your MIL's mom was her role model. She may think...if it ever gets up past the automatic barrier to actually thinking...that she is relating to you, showing concern, contributing. Who knows? We can't make sense of the senseless...and I sometimes think we give credit where it isn't due, in trying to understand. Endure. That seems to be the operational word. I love the idea of imagining a target on her back. Maybe you can think of things to dip the arrows in, like a potion that renders her speechless?   8)

Hee hee.  Luckily, I traded way up and have a great one now!
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Ha! Luise I love your sense of humor! :D
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I think sometimes bossiness is the only way some women can relate across the generational line.  Your MIL's mom was her role model. She may think...if it ever gets up past the automatic barrier to actually thinking...that she is relating to you, showing concern, contributing. Who knows? We can't make sense of the senseless...and I sometimes think we give credit where it isn't due, in trying to understand. Endure. That seems to be the operational word. I love the idea of imagining a target on her back. Maybe you can think of things to dip the arrows in, like a potion that renders her speechless?   8)
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I see your point Pooh thank you!!  It helps to hear the other side and helps me understand.  I have never met my MILs mom, I just figured her being "helpful" was due to the other mother and her lack of caring for her children
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Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: Some advice for me from you ladies please
« Last post by Pooh on April 14, 2014, 01:35:28 PM »
I had to take a good, hard look at my MIL's relationship with her Mother.  Not that it excuses it, and you would think that she would have maybe learned from it and how it made her feel, but her Mother was constantly bossing her around.  You could tell when her Mother started on her, in front of us at times, it made her feel really bad.  So I never could understand why she did it to me.  Then again, I always thought that maybe since her Mother did do it to her, she thought she was supposed to?

I know that when I became an MIL, because of what my first one had done to me, I vowed never to be that type of MIL.  I still have to catch myself sometimes though, trying to "help".  Just simple things like DIL would be at her wits end with teething and griping to me that she had tried everything. Before I thought (because she didn't ask) I would say something like, "Have you tried a cold washcloth or frozen teether yet? Or orajel?"  Good intentions, but I'm sure my own DIL thinks I'm crossing the line at times.  It truly is no reflection of her or that I think she isn't a good Mother.  It's me being "helpful".

Yes, in a perfect world we wouldn't offer advice without being asked.  I'm not perfect :)

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Maybe I will just look at that perspective and tell myself she is just being helpful and caring. 
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Daughter in Laws and/or Son in Laws / Re: Some advice for me from you ladies please
« Last post by Pooh on April 14, 2014, 01:11:23 PM »
I'm sure she is very stressed and it's great that you take that into consideration.  I think many times, MILs included, think they are "helping".
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