Also, please change you user name so you can post anonymously here. It is a requirement that I established to protect members.
When things went down the tubes in my relationship with my elder son, 'Why' was my focus for a long time. I searched for something I did or at least something logical. After way too long, in my case at least, I had to move on because I knew in my heart I didn't deserve the abuse. I couldn't change him but I could change myself. My life now is about a lot more than my biological role. I have other interests...like this Website...and new friends. Life has, when I let go, expanded not contracted. It didn't happen overnight and it was far from painless...but I'm on the other side of all of that and not looking back. My beloved grandson made his own mind up about me when he became an adult. He is world famous in his field and still came to Seattle from Montreal to see me at Christmas and brought his 23 year-old daughter, my great granddaughter, with him. I feel deeply loved, honored and appreciated and they know I love them to pieces. I would never have believed it would turn out like this.