I am convinced there is no wiser place for advice and guidance than WWU....
My daughter & her husband gave birth to their first child this year. They set boundaries when their child was born which I respected but was surprised to see.... they wanted a week alone (no hospital visits, no nothing) before ANY one came to see the baby. (Back in the day my house was Grand Central Station for two months - company every single day. lol) I accepted their boundaries but also told my daughter this was unusual. She was very okay about my sharing my opinion. It hasn't been brought up since then.
However, the other set of grandparents are still struggling with their son and my daughter's decision months later. They still bring it up. My son in law has tried to get them to "agree to disagree" but it's not working. This past week, his father posted something ugly on FB about the situation. My daughter, in reaction to her husband's being upset with the FB post, texted her mother in law "your husband just posted something totally inappropriate on FB."
I think my daughter overstepped boundaries by sending that text to her mother in law. I think her husband should have been the one to send the text and my daughter should just butt out.
My daughter called me yesterday and told me about all about how this played out. They (my daughter & husband) have decided they are not seeing his parents for any holidays based on the nastiness her father in law posted on FB and the nastiness he texted to his son. (It was pretty bad; I will say that....) I fell silent & didn't offer any opinion because I don't like having these conversations over the phone. I'm old fashioned and like face to face.
I will be seeing my daughter in one week and I would like to tell her I think she should have let her husband text his mother and that my daughter should have stayed out of the situation.
Do you ladies agree? If you can offer any advice/perspective I certainly would appreciate it. Please know I have NO desire to get in the middle of this drama -- I simply want to gently advise my daughter.
As always, thank you!!