Well what i thought could or would happen again did. I got a text from my YDD on Saturday morning 2:30am. ' could i come collect her and GS & GD' then a couple of minutes later a phone call from her BF 'could i please come over and help him' as my YDD had, had too much to drink and he didnt know how to deal with her
he added that his FOO had left and that they had all been drinking and my YDD had suddenly lost it after a small incident.
Well i go over there on my own no support (Hubby was away, ODD fast asleep with the cats etc lol). OK imagine my suprise and to a certain extent horror when i get over there and his FOO are all there, because of the commotion they had returned. there were 6 of BF's family (plus 2 small children luckily fast asleep) and a family friend of theirs (my GC were also asleep in their beds). I thought ok, this could be fun..........not.
I go in to gasps of 'it's E___s Mom, whats she doing here' I reply that i was contacted by both my YDD and her BF who had asked me to come over YDD to collect her and GC, BF to try calm her down.
Well i decided there and then not a good move for me to get into an argument , but was pretty peeved when their family friend kept telling me my daughter was vile and had said some horrible things (they say a lot of true things come out when your tongue is loosened by drink dont they?). I replied saying i was not going to bad mouth my YDD but that they already knew what she was like when she drank too much and she shouldnt do it, well this went round in circles, but eventually they left ( which was an improvement on the first time when they refused to let my YDD take her son home). I waited around, making sure my YDD had calmed down, clearing up to keep myself busy etc.
I left at 4am after my YDD had decided to lay down, but whilst her BF locked up the back door (which i couldn't do because i couldn't find a key) I went in asked her if she was ok, told her she shouldn't drink or not as much, satisfied she was ok i vacated the house and came home.
Well in the morning I see on facebook my YDD putting what an a--e she had been that she apologized for being a (nasty word not sure i could put) and that nothing good would come of her drinking and she didn't intend doing it again. Well replies came in and i could not believe some of the stupid ones put ie:- "dont do it ive been off the booze for a year and its boring, people always forgive drunken mistakes" and "it was a good night and ignore pop drinkers" to name two.
She now maintains she remembers nothing of that night but the fact she has been so upset belies that, so i think she is just saying that to not deal with the consequences. I sincerely hope she sticks to what she stated that she will not drink again as she obviously has no self control, i cannot believe on speaking to her BF later (who was not drinking) when he stated that he didnt mind her drinking as he had, had to deal with the consequences with his own family all his life
.......but he did add that she should learn her limitations, not the best answer in my opinion as she has shown she cannot work her limitations out!.
Anyway i think i have decided that if this does happen again (which i pray it will not) that although i will probably go make sure she is ok, that after that enough is enough, i have had to put up with this behaviour since she has been legally allowed to drink alcohol, i did not ask to get involved that night, i was contacted, that i have said many times she should not drink but as most children or AC do not listen to the wisdom of their parents not sure what to expect as i have said this so many times before.
I think i have also decided not to offer to buy things for them when they say they are short of money, i shall only buy things for my GC as they seem to find money to buy the things they want and then plead poverty.
As i have stated before i do not like the way my YDD & BF discipline my GS but realise i cannot do anything about it, the one break in the clouds so to speak is that they have decided to let both sets of GP's to have our GS on one weekend each a month to see if in their words "it improves his attitude/behaviour" whilst i will keep to their rules for mealtimes, & bedtimes i intend also making sure the little soldier has fun and we do things (ie trips out for the day etc) when we have our weekend