Lancaster Lady - they texted my DH to wish me a Happy Birthday (we were in Disney at the time).
And I had just finished clearing up the 'confusion' around my birth DATE and how old I am. Yes, MIL argued with me over how old I am, because *I* couldn't possibly be turning 40!** They used to know my correct birth date but for the past couple of years, they've been getting it wrong (who knows why?). The worst part, it's all 7's, 71/7/17 - does it GET easier than that? Nope, they were stuck on the 19th for a couple of years there.
** this one I can TOTALLY understand. I'm sure that in her head MIL still thinks that SHE is 30, so how can her son and DIL be older than that? We're just *kids*! My Dad used to look at pictures of himself and the GK's and say "WHO is that *old* man holding my Grandson?"
The reason there weren't consequences is that often, they will give me a birthday gift the next time we see them. Well, we saw them for (Canadian) Thanksgiving and there was nothing for me. And when I brought it up to my DH, he said "Sure they got you something." but couldn't specify what it might be. And then he stuck his head in the sand.
I get along quite well with SIL and I asked her if her and her DH get gifts from MIL and she said yes. And SIL is (or was) the black sheep of the family! That shows you that I am less than dirt to MIL and if she doesn't HAVE to give me something (because there's no audience like at Christmas) then she won't.
The thing is, I've been trying to be a better DIL. I accept responsibility for 50% of how our relationship has turned out, so I've been 'working' on that 50%. It just feels to me like MIL is actively trying to make things worse between us.
I think that I may have to go back to being 'mean' to MIL, because it worked. It made her sit up and pay attention and she seemed to act nicer then.