Kick me sign to be removed now

[Ruth]

Oh yes, you can rest assured that I am a voracious reader, and lean toward literature on that side of the water.   Agatha Christie is my favorite, also love Cadfael series, and Sherlock Holmes.  DH is big into  medieval history but I, more just entertainment.   I'll look into this, thanks Doe.

[faithZeldas1]

Ruth, I decided how I would be comfortable helping my son "finish off", sickness stepped in & threw me off course, waters still choppy, but peace increasing as healing increases. I no doubt " did all I could" IMO & that's where it counts. As I got from Luise- no expectations of another's.

[Doe]

(R- there's a supernatural aspect to it but mainly it reads like historical fiction)

[Smilesback@u]

Go Begonia - remember to meet in a public place at lunch and it goes well, schedule another meeting outdoors for a walk etc.  A lot of liars out there, knowing from personal experience -- you can see the scuff marks on my bottom sometime.  LL - you claim your peace of mind and don't let it go now   If I didn't spend time with GC, every breath I take is supposed to be for the GC according to DIL.  Just find your middle of the road and cruise on down it.   Ruth - I agree with finding closure somehow.  Do what you think is best and let it go.  Your DS will figure it out and have had your support to think about in the end.  I started taking photos as a way to help remind me and family that I showed up -- graduation photobook was given as Christmas gifts.  Now that is the way I plan to go...not spend $$$ or a lot of worry about if it is enough.  I say it is enough to share memories.  Love our ideas for a fun festive time.   

[Begonia]

Ruth: I know how agonizing this can be so sending hugs out to you as you figure out the best way with your DS.  I also got to thinking and realized that by asking my DS if he got the package I let down my guard and put him in control again.  In the past I know that DIL has hidden or thrown out packages.  I have to smile to think when I mentioned in my email that there was a $100 gift card in there that they might have tossed out. 

I understand about them not cashing the checks too.  My mother would say about her GK (my DS, DD and Sis' kids) "they aren't starving or else they would have cashed the check I sent them."   She would send $10-25, which was a lot of money to DM.  Now, looking back, I bet she was upset about the GK lack of caring once they were adults, but she never let that show, and left all of them $$$ when she died, which my DD and DS promptly blew on junk.  That taught me a lesson not to leave them much $$, but to spend it so there won't even be a worry. 

[Smilesback@u]

I like what you realized, Begonia, that when what you give is not appreciated, no thank yous, no acknowledgements, then for the love of God, we stop giving it. When DH asked his DS if he preferred cash for gifts, he said he would donate the cash.  Hmmm, this is not a rich kid by any means, seemed like a slap in the face if you asked me.  So guess what?? The moolah stays in our pockets, thanks very much.  We spend time together, treat out to one meal together, and pay our own way for travel, car and lodging.  That's to be accounted for in our gift giving, and so a token gift is what is given.  There are plenty of people who really need the cash for food so we donate to the local Food Bank.   Just don't look back, it can make you crazy. 

[Doe]

  A lot of liars out there, knowing from personal experience -- you can see the scuff marks on my bottom sometime.

Do tell.......??