I really don't know where to start. I am 57, and my adult daughter is 36. For over 17 years now, she has treated me like crap, a stranger, someone that does not matter to her. I also have a son, that is 27. Each from different marriages. My first marriage lasted only 3 years...my daughter's father was a drug-dealer, arsonist, and known murder...along with so many other issues. My daughter always said she would never grow up to be like him. I had his visitation taken away when she was 5, this was for her own safety. He died a few years ago when someone killed him while riding his motorcycle. She now cherishes his memory and treats me like I am nothing. I moved from one state to another (back to my home state) NC to NY. She says it's my fault we don't get along, it was my decision that I moved. However, she still treats me the same as she did when I was living 3 hours away from her. My son is amazing. He is married and would do anything for me, as would my daughter-in-law. I could not ask for a better son. He lives an hour away, but that makes no difference. He would drop everything just to do something for me or to take care of me. I have a lot of health problems and my son is always there for me. My second husband (we are now divorced, but still have a good relationship) is the same way - he is always here for me - no matter what the problem. He was a great father to my daughter. Married when she was 5 - until my first husband took her away from me in her senior year of high school. Then, my friends is when her life changed for the worse, and my hell began. The day she left was the worse in my entire life. She left and I never heard from her for almost 6 months.
So, why am I writing? I need help. A counselor couldn't help and every day of my life I am in tears knowing that I have lost 17 years of her life. She has been/is on drugs and led a low life for over 15 of these years. God please tell me how to help her, or to gain the love and respect that I once thought I had from her.